Indian man finds father’s lost grave in Malaysia after 55 years

Thirumaran left for Malaysia on November 8 after some of his father’s former students in Malaysia were successful in finding his father’s grave.

An Indian man whose father died when he was six months old went to great lengths to locate and visit his father’s grave, which was thousands of kilometres away Malaysia.

Thirumaran, 55, is an activist who runs a school for children rescued from forced labour in Tirunelveli, Tamil Nadu, India.

His father, K Ramasundaram, was a school teacher in Malaysia and died of pneumonia in 1967, when Thirumaran was just six months old. After his father’s passing, Thirumaran and his mother returned to Tamil Nadu in southern India that same year.

According to Tamil Nadu based journalist Prabhurao Anandan, Thirumaran has little to say about his father since he has little memories of him. He had no idea how his father looked because he had never seen a photograph of him.

His mother had told him that his father, Ramasundaram was a great man and a good singer. His mother had also shared that Ramasundaram taught English at Thotta Thesiya Vakai Tamil Palli, a small school run by the Tamil community. 

After his fathers passing, he was buried in the town of Kerling in Malaysia, where the school was located. His mother had carried some of the soil from his father’s grave when they returned. When his mother passed away in 1987, Thirumaran scattered some of the soil brought back on his mother’s grave. Over the years, he had kept several old letters written by his father and passed down by his mother.

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“I often thought that I must visit my father, but I did not think seriously, until now,” said Thirumaran who decided to go find his father’s grave in November.

It began with a search on Google

Thirumaran started his search by looking for the name of his father’s school. He had asked his students for assistance in finding the school on Google.

“I don’t know how to operate a computer. So, my students showed me pictures of the school,” said Thirumaran.

He also found out that the school had since been moved to another location. He then emailed the school’s principal for assistance. With the help of the school administration, Mr. Thirumaran had managed to trace a few of his father’s former students who live in Malaysia. Some of them who are now in their 80’s, offered to accompany him to search for his father’s grave.

Thirumaran said he was surprised to hear about the many nice things his father’s former students had to say about him.

“One of them told me how my father bought him a bicycle to go to school and college. Another said, when he fell behind in his studies, my father helped him well. When I heard all this, I realised what I had lost in my own life,” he said.

Journey to Malaysia

Thirumaran left for Malaysia on November 8 after some of his father’s former students in Malaysia were successful in finding his father’s grave. He walked around the many tombstones in an old cemetery in Kerling, until he found the one that belonged to his father.

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Despite the fact that the grave was a little run-down and overgrown with weeds, his father’s picture, name, birth date, and date of death were all clearly visible on the tombstone.

This time, Thirumaran took a handful of soil from my mother’s grave and placed it on his father’s grave.

“It was as if they shared their love through me, even after death,” said an emotional Thirumaran.

Thirumaran spent the next few days cleaning his father’s grave and praying with lit candles with his father’s former students several times before returning to India on November 16.

According to him, this journey had given him more than he could have hoped for, including valuable memories and old pictures of his father.

“His students told me that I looked like him. For a boy who grew up without his father, this is a life that has come full circle for me,” said Thirumaran.

Chief Minister of Tamil Nadu, MK Stalin, recently stated that Thirumaran’s story of being helped by others along the way is a unique cultural identity of the Tamils.

“Man is an ocean of emotions. I feel Thirumaran’s search for his father’s grave is the search of his life,” Mr MK Stalin wrote on Twitter.

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Gana Prakash

Gana joined Citizen Journal in 2013. He knows everything that makes user generated content ticks. Trained as an electrical engineer, Gana is also a stand up comedian and Liverpool die hard.